Finding balance.
Every day this week I’ve heard from friends and clients telling me how much busier and more stressed they're feeling with work. I even heard one friend was working on a project even though she was furloughed! Now I appreciate businesses need to keep running and are working harder than ever to forge a new path and they need you, but I don’t see the need to push people to their limits.
When we entered lockdown there was a big focus on peoples wellbeing and for this, I am very thankful because I'd just launched Big Love Movement that same week. The conversation was opened up, mental health was in the media and people were genuinely asking how each other were, however, two months in and I feel all is forgotten. It's back to get the job done no matter what it takes, sod that fact you’re homeschooling on the side, bringing up a child or simply deserve and NEED a break, people are working overtime whilst in lockdown and I don't think that's cool.
Overtime is not new but when you are in your own space I believe this warrants an element of respect and a set of rules on your terms. People were reminded to look after their wellbeing and so began making adjustments and trying new things to keep them happy and healthy. The last thing we need now is people sacrificing the things that make them feel good in order to get the job done!
This brings me to my other favourite topic; boundaries.
Boundaries are a topic that's come up about as much as gratitude for me during the lockdown. A LOT.
Setting boundaries is a simple way to support your wellbeing by getting clear on what you feel comfortable saying yes to, and what you actually need to say no to. They're pretty effective too. Your boundaries will be unique to you and relate to situations and other peoples behaviour towards you.
A good thing to think about is the boundaries you set last year or even last month, may need to be relooked at in light of your current circumstances.
By defining your boundaries you affirm your needs matter and allow others to know where your limits are.
Now onto the other thing that bothered me about all this, over the last few months we've been trying to find some balance and structure to a very new way of living. For me it's taken some time and it was pretty rough going at the start, but there's now a sense of flow to my days and perhaps you too are finding your groove. I believe my anger has originated from a fear of us losing this slower pace and sense of balance. Balance to me is the dreamlike state in which different elements of our lives are in equal measure creating a sense of calm which I feared was about to be lost until I realised there is no FLOW with balance, there is steadiness instead. Balance needs to be temporary in order to keep things flowing!
The different elements of our lives hold different values to us on any given day, therefore, the scales need to tip in order to get things done to give time to what we love or need to achieve. The only danger is staying too long in any one place, going to an extreme and losing sight of the other elements which hold value for you.
I don't think we will, or ever should stop trying to find balance in our lives because that's awareness, and that's the respect and self-love we all need to keep bringing us back to the good stuff, the rest, the play and the motivation to get that project finished.
I believe the best thing to come from lockdown is awareness; to ourselves, our personal space and our needs. Balance can be temporary and that's ok, if you lose it you'll find your way back when you need to but for now, just go with the flow.
Your needs matter and so does the business or the job but without you, there is no work or business so look after you first. Be clear on what is ok and what simply isn't right now.
As things change so do you.
Big Love
Becki